6.19.2007
I'll take community with a side of sad
So there have been a few changes and transitions in my life lately. What with switching churches and moving and good friends moving and getting a promotion and my parents moving, things feel a bit rocky and unsteady. I am trying to get some roots put down at the new church. I've really enjoyed singing again and am so very much looking forward to doing S.E. again which KB has decided he can get started since I'm there. But I haven't really had an opportunity to get to know folks at the new church. And I know I need to do that and have some community. So I've been trying out a house group. Admittedly, I was warned against it for the reason I discuss below but I wanted to check it out. Partly because the people that lead it just seemed like really sweet people, partly because when I asked a few folks about the most intellectual-bent group, this was the one they mentioned. Most of the people in the group are U of C graduate students or affiliated with U of C in some way (most definitely intellectuals), which means that they could be done in a few years and move on or they might graduate in August and move on. The latter seems to be the case for more than one person in the group. Try 5 or 6. So this afternoon I'm trying to figure out if I'll go back. Truthfully it's an attempt to save my heart a little bit. I just don't know if I can get moderately close to these people only to have them all leave in a month or two. I feel like I just went through that and it pretty much sucked. And then I'll have to start all over again, again.
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3 comments:
Hannita-
I sympathize with your plight. I avoid abandonment as fiercely as possible, but then I wind up sucking the life out of a couple of people (you included) because you have to sustain me.
I don't mind if you want to suck the life out of me.
(insert emoticon here)
By the way, I am freaking obsessed with your Flickr photographs.
--Minty
Glad someone else is obsessed with my flickr photos too. Although you probably have a few favorites of really tall people.
Well, you know how I feel about tall boys, but still... I am enamored by all things Flickr (I'm most in love with the photograph where you are holding the screaming baby with the word "punch" tattooed on your hand).
I browse strangers' photographed lives rather than dealing with those pesky three-dimensional beings.
That's how I squelch my abandonment fears. That and I peek into peoples' windows at night to see how others live; that's not weird. It's NOT!
I stand by my voyeurism.
--Defensive Minty
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